Live Each Day...

I've realized something. I despise the expression "Live each day as if it were your last." Listen, I'm a huge fan of motivational quotes and the like, but this one is just too over the top to be realistic. Do you know how crazy you'd go if you literally lived each day as if it were the last? I certainly wouldn't go to work. God knows those dishes in the sink wouldn't get washed. The bills sitting on the table? Forget 'em. I most definitely wouldn't be booking trips for next year. And after not doing all of that on the one day, waking up and realizing that there's a new day to live as if it were the last, then I once again would skip work, leave the dishes, etc. The expression itself is just too loaded to be applicable. Something like "Live each day to the fullest" or whatever is tolerable and makes sense, but this other one has got to go. That's why I propose banning all use of it. Starting now.

After about 8 months of them sitting in my closet, I finally grabbed my black dress pants and took them to a seamstress in town yesterday. The bottom seam on one of the pant legs came undone, so was longer than the other side. I had never been to this particular store, but it was owned by a cute little Chinese lady. Her facial expression after inspecting the pants was priceless. She asked me who had done the seam originally, and I told her I bought them like that in a store in the U.S. She couldn't believe it, claiming it was done incorrectly and trying to explain to me how it should have been done. Now, with her testimony, my pants as evidence, and solid legal representation, I have a feeling that together we can take on the GAP on grounds of illegal stitching. I can almost hear their stock price plunging at this very moment. Unfortunately, the real culprit is probably a little 5 year old in some third world country, not yet as well-versed in the art of stitching as his/her 7 year old counterparts. Oh well.

My favorite commercial jingle right now: eBay TV spot airing in Germany. Classic!